On Liberty and Balls

I don't know what’s sadder - That this country woke up a few weeks ago and read the story about a school in Toronto banning the use of soccer balls on the playground or the fact that deep down none of us were really surprised. I know I wasn’t because I am familiar with the Vice-Principal Law of Enjoyment. Which, simply stated, is that for every instance of a child having fun there is an equal or slightly more powerful force that exists solely to stop that activity from happening.

And every generation is different. When I was in grade eight my school banned the Rubik's cube. And why? Because some kid was wandering down the hall with his head buried in the Rubik's cube, he went head first into a door and split his nose open. And I’m sorry, I remember that kid, he was always walking into doors. In fact if I bumped into him today I wouldn't recognize him without the nose bleed.

But the school, their rationale was, well we can't have kids walking around with their heads down, so they banned the cube. Meanwhile it is because we wandered around with our heads buried in our Rubik's cubes that my generation can safely navigate through traffic on foot with our head down while texting on our blackberries. You could say it saved our lives.

This is a war on fun. And it is a slippery slope. In 2014, and this is a fact, in Ontario school clubs will no longer be able to fundraise by selling chocolate, only nutritional items. There’s your future Canada. A sad child on your doorstep trying to sell you a bag of radishes so they can go to a band trip. Get used to it. Because if you let them take your balls your freedom is the next to go. 

Posted: 06/12/2011 11:59:38 PM | with 0 comments

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